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this Website:
Bullying
in
Verbal Bullying
in Text
of NJ Law on NEW:
Roxbury NJ Schools Official Website www.NJBullying.org www.jodeeblanco.com
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An informational site
for parents of students in the We started this website in January 2008 with the goal of a unified voice to better help our children and exert pressure so that our kids have the opportunity to learn in a safe setting free from verbal bullying. Over these months we've found that while a number of Roxbury parents have written to us to relate problems of their children being bullied, only two of those families (to our knowledge) have been willing to confront their Principal over inaction regarding bullying. None have yet taken us up on our offer of a page to anonymously tell their story. Many feared 'push-back' and their child being marginalized. During this time, this website has had the effect of helping several Roxbury families improve their students' situation, has influenced several teachers to do the right thing, has angered other teachers, and is monitored by several groups. However, we no longer imagine that we'll bring district-wide change. We were naive to think the District could be embarrassed into action. So, the site will continue to be informative, and we'll continue to update it as warranted. We are well aware that many kids go thru our School District without any real issues, with some doing very well, but there are a significant number who are marginalized, and a few who are traumatized, and all the while most staff carry on with business as usual. We sincerely appreciate those Roxbury Staff who have helped our children, there truly are some who go the extra mile, our student has been helped by their dedication. Yet attitudes & conditions still exist that cause needless difficulties for our kids. Some staff seem to regard verbal bullying as normative and don't want to be bothered by an alarmed parent. Some staff seem to regard the accommodations Sp Ed children need as an imposition. All that must change, and the LAW is on our side. This became a particular issue at Eisenhower Middle School, where our child attended, with the upheaval in staff over the years 2006 thru 2008, and the assumption by some staff that kids who are 'different' are going to be subject to verbal harassment in those grades, so why bother trying to fight it. The 18 month Teachers salary dispute also tended to occupy some teachers, so the fact of students being bullied lost priority. The former Principal at EMS was one of the few who responded with concern to our warnings about the situation, and he left in mid-year after having locked horns with entrenched teachers who resisted change. That conflict was publicly displayed and documented in an online bulletin board during 2006-7 as supporters and detractors (some with inside info) of that Principal lobbed insults at each other. Many children suffered as their needs slipped thru the cracks. The unbounded respect for public school teachers that my father had instilled in me was worn away, and it's being further worn away as we see an unwillingness to admit any wrongdoing by entrenched educators who feel they should not be held accountable, and their Union backs them in that unprincipled, contemptible stance. Well, we decided that we would not stand by as kids were traumatized. Our family had been thinking about starting a website like this for months, but what moved us to act was a recent documentary on PBS Frontline (Jan 22, 2008) which profiled a middle school student who had been taunted by classmates for months, who then ended up committing suicide. School officials said they had no idea the verbal harassment was going on. We've since learned that this horrible scenario has been repeated many times in recent years. It seems that if you're not a jock, or popular, don't have an bipod in your ear or use profanity you are a target for verbal bullying. While it's great that the school has very strong programs in Sports & Music, for kids not involved with either the tendency is for staff to shunt them aside. The use of filthy, derogatory expletives is common, not only out of the range of teacher's hearing, but as an undertone whispered in the presence of teachers. We have heard teachers privately tell us that they are shocked and exasperated by all this, but publicly all they'll say is that they can't change the prevailing culture. Well, we're not under any delusion that the staff can change it either, but within the walls of the school a safe, positive atmosphere conducive to learning needs to exist, and for many it doesn't. Yes, we recognize that some Guidance Counselors do sincerely care, and they've made efforts to help this situation, but they are met with indifference by the majority. The State of New Jersey School Bully Guideline has the potential to be used in a Legal sense against Districts who routinely fail to actually protect students, and just running an anti-bullying assembly once a year doesn't meet the standard. Those assemblies impress only the kids who wouldn't think of bullying, but those who relish their bully role have made it an art form to do so out of the sight and hearing of staff, in the lunchroom, in the halls. They know there will be no real consequences, and typically there are none, even after you've ID'd the bully by name, the experience of several families confirm this. While we're keeping our family name off this website, we told our student's school staff of this site, and told them who we are. We are concerned parents, we have nothing to do with the School Board or the BOE Elections. We don't want to see some Roxbury kids lost in the shuffle. We think that before we debate Turf fields, or the Roxbury Education Association - NJEA Union role in contract talks, or Salary Guides, we should make sure ALL the kids are able to learn in a safe setting. That's NOT happening. >
Did you know that in the last 3 years, Download the NJ Special Education Rights Code, hosted on our site |
Contact us at info@RoxburySchoolConcerns.org
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OUR STORY Our child was mercilessly taunted and called names from the start of attendance at Eisenhower Middle School, starting in 2006. Our child did absolutely nothing to cause this. It seems that if you're not a jock, or popular, don't have an ipod in your ear or use profanity you can be a target for verbal bullying. When we went to the staff during early 7th grade we were assured that things would get better, the kids were "just testing each other in a new school". In reality, the verbal bullying became far worse, filthy expletives were repeatedly used to harass our child, and all the while our increasing complaints were met by statements like "oh, it's just a rite of passage" or "they'll get tired of it eventually". Well, it got worse as time wore on, and our student was scarred. We strongly believe that aspects of our situation were mishandled by some EMS Guidance staff. The one Guidance Counselor who horrifically botched the handling of our child's situation is no longer (Sept 2008) listed as staff on the EMS website. Her "blame the victim, find fault with the victim" route seemed to be the path of least resistance, far easier than taking effective action against bullies. A perfunctory snap judgment against our child was made as a result of the facts being misunderstood or twisted, we even found the former Superintendent flipping the facts 180 degrees when we urged him to intervene, then when we called his attention to it, he corrected himself, but it was a revealing peek into how our situation had been falsely portrayed within staff meetings. We have it documented. Our child was victimized a second time but in this instance by the adult staff charged with protecting students during the school day. The last 6 months of our time at EMS saw a pattern of missed opportunities on their part to correct the situation of bullying. That's all we wanted. We wanted the bullying to stop. We wanted PE Teachers to actually monitor the Locker Room instead of just telling you they are. Don't just do it for our kid, think about all the others who will be traumatized in the future if some staff continue to abdicate their responsibility. While we think it's great that the school has very strong programs in Sports & Music, for kids not involved with either of those the tendency is for staff to shunt them aside. If the truth dared be said aloud, Roxbury School District worships at the altar of Sports & Music, and little real effort, LITTLE REAL EFFORT is made to promote and staff extra-curricular activities outside these areas. Previous Updates:
Feb
9, 2008 Update: 10 days after reporting the harassment and taunts to EMS
Guidance Dept and District Superintendent, they have not acknowledged our communication.
September 29, 2008 Update: Upon seeing a
situation in School mishandled by the staff, this thought came to mind: January 23, 2009 Observation: While we think it's great that the school has very strong programs in Sports & Music, for kids not involved with either the tendency is for staff to shunt them aside. If the truth dared be said aloud, the District worships at the altar of Sports & Music, and little real effort, LITTLE REAL EFFORT is made to promote and staff extra-curricular activities outside these areas. |
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> SCHOOL BULLYING < > SCHOOL BULLYING < > SCHOOL BULLYING < State
of New Jersey Guidelines on School Bullying (Became NJ State
Law on September 1, 2003) NEW -
"Understanding Bullying and Its Impact on Kids With Learning
Disabilities" by Dr. Marlene Snyder, Ph.D. Jared was a 13 year old Sp Ed student who
was bullied in his school, developed depression, then committed
suicide. School administrators didn't believe Jared's complaint, or
blamed him for his troubles. They are partially guilty of his
death by their "business as usual" negligence. Click
to read Jared's story and find additional resources
P.S.
The Roxbury School District has a clear choice on how to respond to
this website:
- a. Deny there's a problem, instruct the staff on how to respond and have the Attorney advise. In other words, spin the story & protect yourself instead of protecting the children. The NJEA Teachers Union aims to protect Teacher reputations, so they deny any problems. The District seeks to prevent legal liability, so they deny any problems. b. Since it's a
lot of work to find and stop the bullies, Seek to discredit &
find fault with the victim, or c. Do the right
thing by starting something really effective to stop the bullying. |
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This site serves the New Jersey communities of Succasunna, Kenvil, Ledgewood, Landing, Port Morris, Lower Berkshire Valley and Mount Arlington NJ |
Updated June 10, 2009 - 18:45
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